Yesterday, I couldn't feel anything. That normally happens after I cry over something that really hurt me. Apparently, it's a natural defense mechanism that your brain does when it can't handle the emotional distress it's dealing with. Anyway, I couldn't feel anything last night. I felt detached from the world. I knew that the things around me were real, but that loss of connection made me feel like I was just existing rather than living. (Does that make any sense?) Anyway, I feel something today. I only know I can feel because I can cry. If I can cry, I can feel, and if I can feel, then I feel like I'm human and real. I honestly don't know what I prefer: To feel nothing, or to feel sad. I don't like feeling sad, but I also don't like feeling nothing. Whenever I can't feel, I do risky things to try to make me feel something, just anything.
I feel hope because I trust Him.